Entropial Anarchy of Mind

Conflicting thoughts flash past my mind,
Confused, ravaging, destructive,
In times of joy, fleeting quickly,
Or due to pain of pain unkown.

What nudge my chaotic mind,
In directions all, infinite,
Through pathways both traversed before,
And some with grey cement drying...

My mind jumps with alacrity,
Trifle nuances to lacunae,
Like a boat in search of a port,
In a deluging turbulence

No clarity, no cogent thread,
Between thought unique and action,
From white on black or black on white,
How are canvasses of gray made?

Of morality and logic,
Sentimentality and sense,
Deep debates rage within my mind,
Subjective or objective?

Pretense, subterfuge, fake niceness,
To want others to think well of you,
Why do people behave so funny,
Or am I the violation.

Thoughts of reasons, explanations,
I reason my thoughts alone, confused,
Thoughts as to why reason at all,
And why think of reasons to think.

To think is a boon or a curse,
How can storms be quelled with unease,
Why must every road end in forks,
Conflict eternal, chaos reigns.

Is absolute that absolute,
Or truth and lie but reflections,
Mercurial Ambiguity,
Two faces, million sided dice.

Must I question all in fullest,
And debate both action and thought,
Why does grey give rise to grey,
Why is the war so damn civil?

- Thriddas Anorak

Do I take the closed integral over all paths for maximum probability???

When one's own mind is confused, what logical analytical device must one use to gauge my sanity. Delusion v/s Truth. Are will power and delusion that disparate? I must mull these at leisure...

The above poem is a product of confusion, as can be observed from the stanzas. This is my first attempt at a whole poem in blank verse (I mean, without rhyme) The only thing I have strived to maintain is the amount of syllables in every line. How do others manage syllabic symmetry. Found it quite difficult...…